“No Official Doctrine”

Things the LDS Church has no official position on (According to FAIRMormon):

1) Evolution[1] which is funny because the Garden of Eden, The Fall, Noah’s flood and such all are impacted by this concept

2) The Official location of the peoples in the Book of Mormon[2] which is funny since the entire truth claims of the church depend on this book being legitimately about people in North America who are the ancestors of Native Americans

3) Who the Great and Abominable Church is that Nephi is talking about that God shows to Nephi[3] which is funny, because if there are only two churches, the church of the Lamb and the Great and Abominable church, it might be important to know which you are in

4) The Consumption of Cola Drinks[4] which is funny because they are dead set against coffee and tea; when those actually have health benefits[5] proven by science[6] .

6) Whether or not there was Death before the Fall of Adam[7] which is funny because it only matters if one takes the scriptures very, very literally, and needs sex to be somehow linked to all of mankind’s actions.

7) Whether there was a global or local flood[8] which is funny because the church has published that to be Mormon means to acknowledge a global flood in its official magazine[9] and it is a fairly key component to many church leader statements, and yet they know the science doesn’t back up the position

8) When the lands of the earth were separated[10] which is funny because the Bible makes a statement, and despite having prophets with communication to God, they still haven’t answered if this verse can be taken at face value

9) Dinosaurs[11] . Because evidence and every 5 year-old’s heart loving these movie-blockbusting lizards from a previous era is no reason to actually acknowledge their existence.

10) Jesus being married[12] which is funny because early leaders actually cited Jesus’ marriage as proof that he was polygamous to back their own polygamy. Taking away this argument would be “anti-mormon” lies back in the 1860’s

11) Which books are considered doctrine[13] even when they bear the copyright or trademark of “Intellectual reserve inc” doesn’t make it official which is funny because everything had to go through the correlation department before going to printing.

12) Whether a person can progress between the three degrees of glory[14] which is funny because that whole claim about “Families being forever” kinda could somehow be affected by whether people in the Telestial kingdom could show up in the Celestial kingdom one day

13) The age of the Earth[15] which is kinda funny since D&C 77 pretty much states it, and the Nauvoo Masonic Hall still has the year of the earth on the corner from a Young Earth Perspective. Further, it kinda impacts the whole “Adam was the first man” concept

14) The Date of Christ’s Birth[16] which is funny because Apostles have said it over the pulpit during conference even though that date is clearly wrong.

15) Whether Jesus knows who is going to be saved[17] which is funny because that’s part of the definition of omniscience, a trait of God explicitly stated

16) Did God have sex with Mary[18] which is funny because it was explicitly stated by church leaders over the pulpit at General conference.

17) Whether the Sons of Perdition will have another chance at eternal glory[19] yup, even being damned doesn’t mean you are according to the Church official positions

18) Whether Native Americans are Lamanites[20] which is funny because Spencer W. Kimball took kids from their homes to be re-educated by Mormons[21] hoping to make their skin whiter[22]

19) Whether Jesus Christ is the savior of other worlds[23] which is funny because the atonement is described as infinite and eternal. I guess that’s a “limited infinite” that lasts for an eternity.

20) Whether Joseph said the Moon was inhabited[24] which is funny because well, moon-people in 2015… this should be a clear and easy one to simply say “No, we officially don’t believe this”

21) Spencer W. Kimball’s claim that women should fight to the death to preserve their virtue[25] which is funny because he clearly said it, it’s printed in Miracle of Forgiveness and quoted in manuals, and still pretty much used everywhere.

22) Whether the Garden of Eden is in Missouri[26] which is funny because it was pretty clear for most of Church history what Joseph meant.

23) How the Book of Abraham was translated[27] which is funny because it’s a book of scripture that very much informs the LDS worldview, and that is highly suspect in its authenticity. A question to deity could easily resolve this issue.

24) Anything Apologists say[28] which is funny because, they have so few actual opinions of their own, and rely on these unofficial apologists as sources so frequently

Some Official Positions:

1) Adam God Theory is wrong[29] which is funny because Brigham taught it for 37 years[30] including over the pulpit in conference. It’s funny because it’s hard to figure out what is doctrine if this isn’t; and it’s one of the unique teachings of Brigham, whose credibility the LDS church entirely depends upon

2) Opposing the ERA[31] (Equal Rights Amendment for women to be paid the same as men)

3) That hot drinks are tea and coffee[32]

4) The key, official doctrine of the Church is that Jesus is literally the son of God (i.e., this is not a symbolic or figurative expression), and Mary was a virgin before and after Christ’s conception.[33] which is funny to think about, but sure, this one makes some sense.

5) The proclamation on the Family IS official doctrine[34] which is funny because I look forward to reading the FAIR page that corrects the notion that this was ever doctrine in about 10 years

6) The location of the 10 tribes[35] is still that they are scattered, which is funny because, it’s about damn time the church found them.

7) The church support for Prop8 was official[36]

8) There are several official statements that the Blacks will never receive the priesthood[37] including first presidency quotes, which is funny because the only one they highlight is where a church leader claims there was no official position of the church.

Summary Anytime top church leaders cannot unanimously agree on central tenets, the church simply labels the issue with “No official position” which weakens the claim that the 12 are united on policies of the church as several key doctrines are left unanswered. When the church is attacking individuals (Women with ERA, Blacks and the priesthood, Gays with prop8) the church takes an official position.

This damning of others, while refusing to use the prophetic gifts to answer fundamental questions of life and mormonism is evidence the church is damned/apostate as the leaders cannot answer questions, but only dig in their heels when lobbing the church’s weight against minority groups seeking equality.

The church must take official positions on doctrinally relevant questions or it will continue to grow doctrinally irrelevant while appearing to merely be a vehicle for bigoted hate.

Or maybe that’s just FAIRMormon’s official position?